The story of the day today seemed to be the details emerging from Kellen Winslow Jr.'s November arrest for possession of marijuana. An athlete getting arrested for possession of anything these days is not all that surprising. But today, court documents revealed a bit more color behind the arrest.
Winslow was allegedly masturbating in his car, in a Target parking lot, because he got lost on the way to Boston Market. How this adds up is beyond me. When you're high, and craving some chicken and mac and cheese, and your own stupidity prevents you from procuring said food, the next logical choice is to masturbate in a parking lot, I guess?
Well, Boston Market responded to this unwanted publicity in a perfect way:
— Boston Market (@bostonmarket) January 17, 2014
This is a brilliant move on Boston Market's part. Sure, they could have just ignored it, but with how the interwebs exploded with this story, it would have done more harm then good for them to stay silent. Unless of course they made an ill-timed choking the chicken joke.
We have yet to see a similar tweet from Target, but they have bigger things to worry about than misdeeds happening in their parking lots.